The Manifesto of Looserism
-By Baba Obey
Note:- Only the image is AI generated, Because why Not !
Preamble
We, the undying and unmotivated champions of Looserism, hereby declare our independence from the shackles of purpose, ambition, and that godforsaken thing called “productivity.” We have come to liberate the world from the cruel tyranny of hustle culture, self-help gurus, and the incessant drumbeat of “do more” that plagues every corner of modern existence.
The Looserist Revolution is not one of grand ideals or lofty dreams. It is not about change, growth, or success. No, dear comrades, it is the revolution of doing absolutely nothing and finding joy in the mundanities of life. We shall no longer be slaves to that mythical creature known as “Motivation.” For in the world of Looserism, doing nothing is doing something, and doing that something well is the greatest victory of all.
Principles of Looserism
- The Tyranny of Motivation
We, the Loosers, are born free from the chains of motivation. No longer shall we chase the high of a goal, the itch of ambition, or the burden of a 5-year plan. We are the anti-heroes, the rebels who rise every day without the need for a reason. What’s the point of wanting to do something when it’s far more fulfilling to simply not do anything at all? Ask yourself, what’s the point of grinding when you can be chilling? - Excitement is Overrated
You know that feeling when you’re supposed to be excited about your life, but instead, you’re just… bored? That’s fine. Actually, it’s better than fine—it’s a lifestyle. The mainstream world wants you to believe that everything must be a thrill, a rush, a dopamine hit. Screw that. The real thrill is in the quiet, the static, the hum of nothing happening. Life is not a sprint; it’s a leisurely stroll around your local 7-11 at 3 AM, trying to figure out if you should get a Slurpee or just stare at the hot dog machine in contemplation. - The Art of Hovering
Looserism is not a call to action; it is a call to hover. Roam aimlessly, like a cat in heat, just gliding through life with no destination in mind. Let your life be a series of half-thoughts, unfinished tasks, and uncharted detours. You don’t need a purpose, because your mere existence is the purpose. Hover like the fog on a cold morning, there but not really here. Embrace your inner loaf. - The Joy of Doing Nothing
Doing nothing isn’t a lack of productivity—it’s a celebration of freedom. Just because you’re not posting your “morning routine” on social media doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. In fact, the morning routine is a scam. Instead, wake up, yawn, stare out the window for an hour. Let your brain stew in the delicious broth of non-thought. Perhaps you’ll wonder, “What if I did nothing today?” To which the answer is, “Yes. That’s the right choice.” - Self-Help Is for Suckers
Have you ever read one of those books titled “How to Be Productive” and thought, “Nah, I’m good.” Congratulations, you’ve taken the first step towards Looserism. To the gurus peddling advice on how to improve every aspect of your life: we say this—you’re full of shit. Nobody needs to “maximize potential.” We’ve already reached our full potential. It’s lying on the couch, surrounded by snack wrappers, watching reruns of shows we’ve seen a thousand times. That’s the zen, the purest form of enlightenment. - Rejection of Status Quo Bullshit
In this world of hustle, success, and grinding, the one thing that isn’t celebrated is laziness. And we are here to change that. We will not abide by the “rise and grind” mentality. We reject it with the passion of a teenager dodging chores. Our motto is simple: “Rise and… nap.” Let others boast about their ‘grind’; we’ll be over here sipping lukewarm coffee, scrolling through memes, and enjoying life without the added pressure of achieving anything beyond surviving the day. - Crass Humor and Embracing Your Inner Sloth
We Loosers don’t apologize for the messiness of our lives. We are the embodiment of chaos wrapped in a blanket burrito. If you’re not willing to laugh at your own lack of productivity, then who are you to judge the person who just spent the last three hours watching YouTube videos about conspiracy theories involving pigeons? It’s all the same, really. And hey, at least we’re enjoying it.
The Future of Looserism
What does the future hold for the noble followers of Looserism? More of the same, really. We’re not planning world domination (that sounds like a lot of work). We’re not changing society—who has the energy for that? We’re just here to spread the sweet, sweet joy of doing nothing and letting the world sort itself out without our interference.
The Looserist movement is not about destruction; it’s about peace. Peace from ambition. Peace from deadlines. Peace from expectations. Peace.
And if that’s too deep for you, well… maybe you should try sitting in silence for an hour and think about it. Or not. Your choice.
Join the Looserist Revolution—Do Nothing.
P.S. If you’ve made it this far in the manifesto, congrats, you’re probably already one of us. You’ve done well to waste time on our nonsense. Now go nap, or hover aimlessly for a bit.